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  • ๐…๐ซ๐จ๐ฆ ๐‘๐จ๐š๐ ๐–๐š๐ซ๐ซ๐ข๐จ๐ซ ๐ญ๐จ ๐†๐ก๐จ๐ฌ๐ญ ๐Œ๐จ๐๐ž โ€“ ๐„๐ง๐จ๐œ๐คโ€™๐ฌ ๐†๐ซ๐ž๐š๐ญ ๐Œ๐ฎ๐ญ๐ž ๐๐ฎ๐ญ๐ญ๐จ๐ง
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๐…๐ซ๐จ๐ฆ ๐‘๐จ๐š๐ ๐–๐š๐ซ๐ซ๐ข๐จ๐ซ ๐ญ๐จ ๐†๐ก๐จ๐ฌ๐ญ ๐Œ๐จ๐๐ž โ€“ ๐„๐ง๐จ๐œ๐คโ€™๐ฌ ๐†๐ซ๐ž๐š๐ญ ๐Œ๐ฎ๐ญ๐ž ๐๐ฎ๐ญ๐ญ๐จ๐ง

Malawi Cables May 17, 2026 (Last updated: May 17, 2026)
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๐Œ๐”๐‚๐‘๐€๐‚๐Š๐ˆ๐๐† ๐Ž๐ ๐’๐”๐๐ƒ๐€๐˜:

By your Sunday troublemaker, channelling the late Raphael Tenthaniโ€™s biting wit.

Ah, Malawians! Pull up a bench. Letโ€™s laugh before we cry.

Enock Kamzingeni Chihana hit the ground running after that October 2025 swearing in like a man who just won the lottery and the North at the same time.

Funerals? He was chief mourner.

Rallies? He was dancing.

Tree-planting in Phalombe?
The man was practically hugging baobabs.

Up and down the country, convoy blazing, reminding everyone: โ€œThe North delivered, bwana!โ€ Classic kingmaker who finally got the big seat but refused to sit still.

Thenโ€ฆ poof!

For the past several months, Honourable Chihana has entered full ghost mode. Haahaha! The once restless traveller is now quieter than a broke manโ€™s pocket on the 31st.

No more fire. No more Northern thunder. Just polite press statements: โ€œWell done journalists,โ€ โ€œWorkers, you are the backbone,โ€ โ€œPlant more trees, my people.โ€

The DPP coalition must have found the ultimate remote control. One press of the mute button and the AFORD lion from Rumphi turned into a harmless house cat purring official lines from the VIP lounge.

Where is the man who used to make presidential candidates queue like patients at Kamuzu Central? Now he surfaces for Labour Day messages and World Press Freedom Day greetings like a disciplined civil servant.

The North is scratching its head: โ€œIs this the same Enock or did they swap him with a well-behaved cousin?โ€

My late brother Raphael Tenthani would have died laughing. Heโ€™d call it โ€œVice Presidential Retirement Syndromeโ€,you get the title, the convoy, the budgetโ€ฆ and suddenly your mouth develops selective lockjaw.

The kingmaker became the kingโ€™s quiet deputy. The spider that built the web is now politely watching from the corner, hoping nobody shakes it too hard.

But seriously, bwana Chihana,the name you carry doesnโ€™t do โ€œlow profile.โ€

Chakufwaโ€™s son was never meant to be a decorative plant. The Aford people who voted Blue are waiting for the real Enock to return from annual leave.

Until then, weโ€™re left with the silenceโ€ฆ and plenty of jokes in the drinking joints.

As Saulos Thindwa would singโ€ฆ.

Chihana Machineโ€ฆ.. MACHINE!!!
Enock Machineโ€ฆโ€ฆ..MACHINE!!!

Honourable Saulos Thindwa, this is for you, when the lion finally wakes up and roars again, make sure the microphone is working.

Haahaha.

๐“๐ก๐ข๐ฌ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐š ๐๐ž๐๐ข๐œ๐š๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง ๐ญ๐จ ๐ฆ๐ฒ ๐ฅ๐š๐ญ๐ž ๐Ÿ๐ซ๐ข๐ž๐ง๐ ๐‘๐š๐ฉ๐ก๐š๐ž๐ฅ ๐“๐ž๐ง๐ญ๐ก๐š๐ง๐ข. ๐Œ๐‡๐’๐‘๐ˆ๐.

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Malawi Cables is a dedicated news platform committed to delivering timely, accurate, and credible coverage of events and stories from Malawi and beyond.We aim to inform, educate, and engage our readers through in-depth reporting, insightful analysis, and impactful storytelling that sets us apart.

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